You will fail over and over and over. I guarantee it!

1 hour ago

5 min read

This is the last blog in our series “Fear of Failure”. We have talked about trying, even when you know you will fail (think Michael Jordan), the Burnt Toast Theory (good that can come from failing), and finally, overcoming obstacles in your past failures (Einstein and Jones).

But what if you try and try and try and keep on failing? Am I going down a wrong path? When can I just finally give up?

I think since high school, I have always been on a diet. It’s funny because all through high school and college, I was thin but I always thought I needed to lose weight (thank you TV and magazines:). I never lost any but that is beside the point! After having my first daughter, I did gain a lot of weight. I can’t blame it on the pregnancy. I just ate a lot! I lost a few pounds but then got pregnant again and ate what I wanted. My second daughter was born in 2000 and I have been on some type of diet ever since.

I would try this diet and that diet and lose a few pounds, but then put them back on. I always failed at my diets but would always start again on Monday. I consider myself a smart person but boy, I just couldn’t lick this. Finally, in 2022, at my heaviest weight, I lost 35 pounds that year and kept it off. I finally found something that worked for me—intermittent fasting. This is not for everyone but it fit my lifestyle and my eating habits perfectly. I knew I needed to find something I would do for the rest of my life, easily. This was it. Between that, some stomach issues that required me not to eat after 5 pm, and my diabetic medication (GLP-1), I finally lost 100 pounds in 3 years. I have kept it off for 1 year and don’t see me gaining it back because I will keep this lifestyle. It fits me perfectly. I will talk about my weight loss another time and let you know what I have learned and what I am still learning:)

I just kept failing and it was frustrating. Over and over again. It may seem like a small thing to some people but it consumed my thoughts. What can I eat? What can’t I eat? It’s called food noise and it was constant. But I never gave up. I just knew, somehow, something would work for me. I just had to keep looking, learning, and digging. It took 22 years but I finally found it.

It would have been easy for me to give up. To say, “this is who I am for the rest of my life”. Some people do that and I don’t think there is anything wrong with that. I think losing weight for vanity is the one reason it doesn’t work. You have to have a good “why” for it to work. For me, I needed to lose the weight because of health. If I wanted to live to see my grandchildren, I needed to make some changes.

Sometimes, we do need to “give up” if we don’t have a good “why”. But don’t give up because of frustration, setbacks, or failure. Those are poor reasons and in our history, there are people who, if they had given up because of failure, history would be different today.

You probably know this story but it is worth repeating.

There is a man who had many failures (and a few successes). Let’s list them.

Lost his job
Defeated in running for legislature
Failed in his business
Elected to legislature (success)
Girlfriend dies (setback)
He had a nervous breakdown
Defeated in election for Speaker of the House
Defeated in nomination for Congress
Finally elected to Congress (success)
Lost in renomination
He was rejected for the job of land officer
He was defeated in election for the Senate
Defeated for nomination for Vice President
Again, defeated in election for the Senate
Finally was elected as President

Yes, this is Abraham Lincoln. If you look, he failed at business and politics but never gave up. He felt he could do good and he did. Think how different our country would be right now. When you ask people to list 2 presidents, they usually say Washington and Lincoln. Washington because he was our first and Lincoln because of all that he did for our country.

What if he got frustrated and gave up? Think about that for a moment.

Let’s do another example that maybe you didn’t know the story but you know the man.

A bridge killed his ferry business
Electricity wiped out his lamp company
The depression shut down his gas station
His business failed because a new interstate was built that bypassed his restaurant.
He loaded his car with a pressure cooker, flour, spices, and a blanket.
He drove around the country, cooking in diners, trying to convince owners to try his new recipe.
They said no 1,009 times. Yup–one thousand and nine times!!
On the 1,010th time, someone said yes.
By the time he was 73, he had 600 franchise restaurants.
By the time he died, there were 6,000 franchise restaurants in 48 countries, and doing $2 billion a year in sales.

He was told no over a thousand times!! But he never gave up. Thank God because I love Kentucky Fried Chicken!

Thank you Colonel Sanders!

Don’t give up. Don’t get frustrated. Observe what is happening but don’t judge. Practice, keep trying, evaluate, adjust, but don’t give up.

Fear of failure is powerful. It can stop you dead in your tracks. It can keep you from trying.

Four weeks ago, I asked you “What are you afraid to do because you might fail?”

Ok, let’s make that more powerful. Answer this question–not with thoughts or words but with action. Today, Right Now.

What would you do with your life if you had zero risk of failure?

Answer that question.

Then realize you haven’t done it yet because of Fear of Failure. Don’t let that be your defining moment. Don’t let that be your legacy.

Go do it. You will fail—over and over and over. Good. But don’t let that fear stop you. Think of all the great men and women of this world, famous and everyday people you know, who would be different and lead different lives if they let fear of failure stop them.

Don’t let that be you. Go forth and do great things.

If you’re not failing, you’re not learning.

If you’re not learning, you’re not growing.

If you’re not growing, you’re not living.